Our church is undergoing a series called 40 Days of Love. Not to toot my own horn but I've always been known as a "nice " person who pretty much has a lot of compassion and love for others. I even tend to cheer for the underdog. So, going through something like this "love" series, I'm a minister's wife, it shouldn't be any big deal for me, right?
Wrong!!! Since I've started reading the book, " The Relationship Principles of Jesus," by Tom Holladay, with my church, I've been convicted daily. To love like Jesus loved...impossible. To aim to love like Jesus, well it is not an easy task. I have been trying so hard to just be open and loving towards those I come in contact with, strangers and friends alike. I'm trying to smile more, do more, be uplifting in my speech, truly listen when my kids are talking and just do extra little things for my hubby. (Yeah, reading through the Fireproof stuff too.) However, there are some days like today, when I just feel helpless. Like I can't fight off the bad of this world and it wants to suck the life out of me. Ever feel like that?
I woke up this morning with the verse of the week, for our church, on my mind; "Love...doesn't keep a record of wrongs that others do." 1 Cor.13:5 (OUCH!!!) I even prayed that the Lord would help me stay true to that verse today. Yet, by the time my lunch break hit, I already felt like I had failed my Lord. I came home for lunch and just begged God to show me some sign of encouragement today; a letter, a verse, an encouraging word, anything.
"Ask and you shall receive!"
I had rented the movie Fireproof over the weekend...LOVE IT! The movie speaks to me in a special way every time I see it. Anyway, when I was watching it one of the songs jumped out at me in the movie. After the movie was over, I of course sat down at my friend the computer and Googled the song. I found it and it is one of my new favorite songs!
While I'm Waiting - John Waller
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on you, Lord
And I'm hopeful
I'm waiting on you, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait.
I will move ahead, bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience
While I'm waiting
I will serve you
While I'm waiting
I will worship
While I'm waiting
I will not be faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait...
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on you, Lord
And I'm peaceful
I'm waiting on you, Lord
Though it is not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on you, Lord
You can go to his website and watch the video of the song. Anyway, I decided to cheer myself up at lunch today, and watch the video. I did, only this time, for some reason, as I was watching the video, I was drawn to the cross, that is in the movie. It is a big part of the movie, so I had seen it before, but today I couldn't take my eyes off of it...
All of a sudden I jumped up and ran to my back yard... It was still there!
Last summer, an old storage unit was moved off the church property to our yard, for Kev to use as a workshop and for storage. He had to clean it out. Inside had been everything from old appliances to props from past musicals. Many things were thrown away. There was however one object that Kev had leaned up to the building and I guess kind of forgot about. I now know why... it was my "sign" in the backyard. My reminder that God does "LOVE" me and that He is going to carry me through the rough days and rejoice with me during the good ones. He was sending me the "sign" I had begged for and then reminded me of my verse..."love does not keep a record of wrongs..."
I had passed that cross a million times while pulling into my carport. I just need to be reminded that it was there. I do not know how long it will stay there. It doesn't really matter. It served it's purpose today... reminding this girl how to love. Though some days "it's painful, I'm waiting on you , Lord!"
2 comments:
Absolutely beautiful...love your story of the cross!!
I've seen that cross!!!!
Love ya!! (And I won't tell anyone that you really aren't that nice!! Just kidding!!!) ;)
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