Tonight I watched the buses pull out of the church parking lot and I wanted to cry. I am not going to camp this year. My favorite part of the summer...
It is hard to understand God's timing sometimes. I have been angry, frustrated, sad and even a little depressed lately. I am thankful for the Lord' s healing strength, yet so frustrated with the timing of everything going on. I am feeling better these days, health wise. I am slowly, but surely getting my strength and energy back. I am following the doctor's diet like a good gal should. I have lost another two pounds in the last week. I am waiting patiently for the surgery that awaits me next month.
Yet, at this moment in time, I want to stomp my feet, raise my fists and scream "WHY?!!!"
And once again, the Lord wraps me in His loving embrace, holds me tight and softly says "Because I said so." He doesn't have to give me an answer to my "whys." He is not accountable to me. The best part of it all, is that the Lord still loves me, even when I throw my little tantrums. He is patient when I don't want to understand why things aren't going the way I PLANNED. Even though I am frustrated today, I know He sees the bigger picture. His timing is perfect and one day He might just let me in on "why" things are going the way they are right now.
So where am I right now?
I am just a gal who is trying her best to follow where the Lord leads even when she doesn't understand the plan right now. So excuse me while I cry a few tears. I might even stomp my foot as I type. I am however, going to try my best to keep plugging along in faith. Some days that seems to be all I have.
Someone asked me the other day how I was doing. My answer? "One day at a time good." Isn't that all God really asks of us. Just give Him one day at a time and pretty soon those days will turn into years of faith.
Please pray for the 72 people that went to youth camp this year, including my baby girl. they have a long, wonderful week ahead of them. I pray the Lord will rock their world for Him.