Tears...

Remember this book? I do. I got my first copy thirteen years ago. I remember reading it cover to cover. I then bought the follow up books too. I was going to be prepared...

I have a complaint. Within the covers of that book, they forgot to mention how many times a mother's heart will break. They left out the part where a mom has to be on her knees daily in prayer or she will not survive. That you can have the sweetest, smartest most beautiful babies, but they will learn what the word "pain" means and you will have to get them through the moments.

Last night was a night for tears in my household. My son had watery eyes after "venting" his frustration a little over not getting his way. Discipline can be so hard at times. Heart cracking just a little more as you try to stand your ground, not wanting to be called "mean" yet wanting what is best for the child you love. Especially when they don't understand and it may take 15 more years until he really "gets it" and appreciates his mom. "It really is harder on me than him" sometimes...

And then there was my daughter. This teenage age is so hard. I've known it for a long time, with my husband being in student ministry, but nothing prepares you for the heartache you feel over your daughter's tears. Last night was over being ignored by some more "popular" girls that happen to go to our church. The painful part is they love her dad, their minister, but will not give her the time of day unless he or I are around. What do you say to that? I have plenty of answers, I've been dishing them out for years now. But when the child is my own...

Motherhood can stink sometimes. The unconditional love we feel for our kids, well we think everyone should have it. Unfortunately that is not how the real world works. There are always going to be the bullies, the "mean girls," the "unfair" teacher, the insensitive coach, that one person that's goal is to get on their nerves... Some battles we can fight for them, others we can cheer from the stands. However, it is those moments that we can't control or change that hurt the most. Feeling so helpless when the tears flow, lying through your teeth saying everything will be better tomorrow, when you have no clue. When all you can do is pray, while your heart is breaking for your child.

No, nobody ever warned me about the tears. Tantrums, yes! Screaming, I was warned on. Stubbornness, I married their father didn't I? Fighting among siblings, well I have been there and done that! Bullying, a visit to the principle is in order. Name calling, we turn the other cheek. Tears and hurt feelings? Total helplessness.

Nobody ever told me what to expect. I am just thankful that I do know what to expect one day. For there is a book that has left nothing out. The Bible. I am thankful for the promises it holds within it's covers. I am thankful that along with prayer a band aid is put on my cracked heart every time circumstances send floods of tears my way. I know I can't always stop my children from the hurt this world offers, but I can teach them who holds the peace that can dry their tears and mend their hurts. They have a loving Heavenly Father who knows all the answers when mom falls short.

Thank you, Jesus!

"HE will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more...mourning or crying or pain..." Revelation 21:4