Well today a big one decided to come my way. In fact I watched it roll in. The sky got black, the rain poured, thunder boomed and lightning streaked and the weather radio in my director's office kept going off. On the inside I was trembling with fear. Not only were my kids across town at school, but here I was in charge of ten little ones. Ten mommies were depending on me to keep their babies safe no matter what. It scared me.
I take care of these same babies everyday. I feed them when they are hungry, rock them when they are sleepy, change their diaper when needed and just love them during the hours that their mommies can't. However, I've never really thought about having to keep them "safe," until this morning.
Here I was, trying to stay calm on the outside, trembling in fear on the inside, while trying to control the panic that was wanting to come out. I went to the restroom... and prayed.
There in that moment, I asked for peace. Just like I had to put my own babies in the Father's hands, when they were not with me, I had to put these other babies in His hands too. And you know what, my Jesus is the Prince of Peace, because He brought it today. He raised a hand to the storm in my heart and mind and said, "Be still."
The storm passed, but it just served as another reminder of how I really don't have any control of any situation. None of us know what the minutes ahead have in store for us. I can chose to worry about them or give them to God. I wish I could say I will never be afraid again, but unfortunately I can't. I can however, rely on a loving God to bring His peace my way when things get rough.
The crazy thing is that another wave of showers came through this afternoon. Around 3:30 I felt this great need just to hear my kids voices. I just wanted to make sure everything was OK. I would find out later that when Kev was driving them home after picking them up from school that they almost had a wreck. A lady pulled out in front of them on the highway and Kevin had to slam on his breaks hard enough that they "squealed and left black streaks on the street." (Jordan's words.)
No, we just never know what lies ahead. We can chose to worry. We can chose to panic. We can choose to be afraid. OR we can choose to BELIEVE in the Prince of Peace. (while we still do all those other things too!!! Sorry, but I am human!)
"O Lord my God, when I in awesome wonder
consider all the works thy hands have made,
I see the stars, I hear the rolling thunder,
Thy power thru out the universe displayed.
Then sings my soul, my Savior God to thee
How great thou art, how great thou art!"
Lord, I pray that I can live everyday day in peace, knowing that you are there watching out for me and mine...